The Modern Guide to Choosing an Engagement Ring

Are there any universal rules of etiquette?

None. There is no such thing as a diamond too large or too modest. Social expectations exist, of course, but unless you plan to dine with hereditary peers, you needn’t worry about them. Choose what delights you and, most importantly, what will delight your partner.

Is an engagement ring strictly necessary?

Not at all. It’s entirely optional. Until the 20th century, the presence of an engagement ring — like so many other customs — depended on a couple’s faith and their social standing. The modern tradition of presenting a ring is surprisingly recent, shaped largely by Hollywood in the first half of the twentieth century. Whether you choose to give a ring or skip the ritual depends solely on your own views and those of your partner.

Is there a universally recognised “traditional” engagement ring design?

More or less. The classic formula is a single statement gemstone set prominently on a band. A diamond remains the archetypal choice — not only for its beauty but for its exceptional durability. As the hardest natural mineral, it resists scratching and requires minimal care. In fact, diamonds withstand impact better than sapphires, rubies, and certainly emeralds (the latter should ideally be removed even for handwashing). The famous line “a diamond is forever” is therefore not merely clever marketing, but a fair summary of the stone’s physical qualities.

Isn’t a diamond too predictable?

Only if your partner has explicitly said so. A lot of people like pink sapphires.  If they have, you likely know which gemstones they prefer — start there.  If the worry is that they gravitate toward the unconventional, consider a coloured diamond. These are often significantly more expensive than their colourless counterparts, but even a tiny vivid yellow, pink or blue stone looks strikingly original. And remember: our bespoke service is always at your disposal.

Are the engagement ring and wedding band the same thing?

Not usually. Most wear both either stacked on the same finger or side by side. It’s worth choosing an engagement ring whose design pairs gracefully with a future wedding band. Some do swap hands after marriage, placing the wedding band on the right hand and the engagement ring on the left. In a few families, the engagement ring is worn only on anniversaries. If that sounds like your scenario, you may choose something ornate and festive rather than minimalist and classic.

Is it better to surprise or choose the ring together?

It depends. Many modern brides and grooms are perfectly comfortable saying they want to select the ring with their partner. If that’s your situation, agree on a budget and head to a boutique — or directly to a bespoke consultation. No hints from her? Then plan a surprise. It will require discreet research.

What should you find out to ensure the surprise goes well?

Start by peeking into their jewellery box. Look at the pieces and watches what they wear. If their collection leans towards round cuts and soft lines, keep to that aesthetic. If you see structured shapes and rectangular stones, they may favour the clean geometry of princess or emerald cuts paired with crisp gold lines. Next, get a sense the ring size — a non-lazy approximation is enough. Any jeweller can fine-tune the fit after that “yes”. Measure the inner diameter of a ring they wear on index or ring finger; tracing it onto paper works well too. If you only find a ring for the middle finger, choose one size down for the ring finger.

Where can I ask you any other questions?

We will be happy to help, please contact our Client Services team